"POSSIBILITIES"

I am a Raleigh native.  I have twin daughters who are grown.  My husband of 39 years died in 2020.  It was a shock.  

Until that time, I lived a fairly normal life.  My husband had already retired.  I was talking about retiring.  Then COVID hit and there didn't seem to be a good reason to retire so I kept working albeit mostly from home.  When my husband died, I lost my way.  My daughters and best friend checked on me but it seemed all my couple friends disappeared and I was very lonely.  For the longest time I just sat in the house waiting for something to happen.  Eventually, I realized that if I wanted things to change, I was going to have to change.  

I started going to the park to walk and reached out to other people to see if they would walk with me.  I started attending yoga and Pilates classes at the Y.  I joined a couple of meetup groups.  Singing had always been a big part of my life.  I had sung with a number of organizations in my youth but for years my performances had consisted of church solos.  One of my friends at church told me that the praise band members got together periodically to play rock and roll and asked if I would like to join them.  I jumped at the chance! From there, one of my musician friends (Dave) and I started doing open mics on a semi regular basis.  Through the open mics, I found a place for myself and met a number of wonderful musicians like Tom Del Corro. He invited Dave and I to perform at one of the network events. 

I agree that loneliness and isolation are huge issues for seniors like me.  It has taken me two years of hard work, but I have new friends. New creative outlets.  I am not where I want to be, but I am farther along that I was when I started.  I have people I check on regularly.  I have people who check on me.  After spending a lot of time reaching out to others, they have started reaching back.  I try really hard to say yes to any invitation I get even when it is out of my comfort zone.  I do not take for granted the efforts of other to spend time with me or include me.  I have started dating which is not for the faint of heart for folks out age.  I am hoping to travel and am considering traveling alone or with a small group of singles.  I now believe in possibilities, and I think that might be one of the keys to life at this age. 

VICTORIA VOIGHT